Comments on: Fitting-in vs Being Authentic (part I)

By: Jeanne Male

Jeanne Male — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 19:05:54 +0000

Tina, thanks for sharing your head-spinning inventory and wows. I cannot tell you how much it means to to know that I’m facilitating the inventory of someone’s self and life.

Kathleen, WOW, I loved this line from your comment because I personally know it to be TRUTH: “When I clear my mind and connect with my heart, I can clearly feel and allow a spontaneous communication or action. When the deepest part of me is at peace… I am connected with my own authentic self and other people just mirror back my inner state to me.” It’s wonderful to create and be in this type of flow and I now remind myself of it every time I am in a situation where things feel “off”.

By: Kathleen Casey

Kathleen Casey — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 17:10:23 +0000

Hi Jeanne, I just read part 3 and realized I hadn’t yet read part one; so glad I did! I’m smiling remembering a conversation with a friend when I told him that I was almost back to “normal”. He laughed and said that “The Universe” no longer regarded me as “normal”, referring with humor to my sound healing practice. The truth is that while I have pushed my comfort level in certain areas of my life, there are still plenty of places where I can expand. Your article and your honesty inspire self-reflection and a safe place to look at those areas. Your questions are great and if I answered them all this would be another post!
I notice that whether it’s a twitter post or standing up in front of a room full of people, my intellect often wants to censor or edit something. When I clear my mind and connect with my heart, I can clearly feel and allow a spontaneous communication or action. When the deepest part of me is at peace with what I am doing, it no longer matters whether or not anyone else approves. It’s all about whether or not I am connected with my own authentic self and other people just mirror back my inner state to me. I notice this has often happened with twitter tweets–you are not the only one who has been stretched by social media!
.-= Kathleen Casey´s last blog ..Create From a Clean Heart =-.

By: Are You Normal? Fitting-in vs Being Authentic (part 3) : JobLife Architect

Are You Normal? Fitting-in vs Being Authentic (part 3) : JobLife Architect — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 22:35:29 +0000

[...] bravery that I’m speaking about was summed up beautifully in a comment to part 1 of this series. Karen Swim said, ” doing me scared is better than not doing me at [...]

By: TinabobinaS

TinabobinaS — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 17:09:11 +0000

Wow Jeanne Male – my head is still spinning on your thoughts and the comments as a result. Wow and great slice of taking inventory on ones life and self. Thank you.

By: Are You Normal: Fitting in vs Being Authentic (part 2) : JobLife Architect

Are You Normal: Fitting in vs Being Authentic (part 2) : JobLife Architect — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 20:55:15 +0000

[...] grateful for the many comments to this week’s launch post on this topic. In the comments to part 1 of the series, John Reddish provided an excellent frame of reference for why many of us are [...]

By: Jeanne Male

Jeanne Male — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 19:03:22 +0000

GL: A huge grin came to my face as I read your comment, “only recently that I have adapted an un-normal desire to be a bit more un-normal. I like it.” Thanks for sharing that! For me it feels like I’m becoming more and more comfortable in my own skin coupled with the forces that John Reddish mentioned.

Joanna: So many of your word choices sum it up; respond, connect, listen, respect, value the person, and courage. You and Karen Swim have been excellent models for authenticity and wonderful for helping me to find my voice.

By: Joanna Young

Joanna Young — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 18:35:03 +0000

Jeanne, I’m certainly with you on this one One of the things I love about blogging is that it allows us to find and develop our own unique voice, and then start to make connections with those who respond to, connect with, listen to, respect and value the person we are starting to reveal. I see so many people growing and stretching through those networks of support – finding the courage to be more truly themselves. Authentic, not fitting in. It’s wonderful. Thanks for exploring it and encouraging more of us to the same.
.-= Joanna Young´s last blog ..How Do You Write to Learn? JJL Group Writing Project =-.

By: Jeanne Male

Jeanne Male — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 15:43:43 +0000

Jeff, thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment! Loved the analogy of the painting and especially your last line. The more that I “live and let live” the more able I am to “let go” of those that cannot.

By: GL Hoffman

GL Hoffman — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 15:35:34 +0000

Nice post, Jeanne. Very honest and revealing, too, I like that about you. You are not afraid to put yourself out there, and reveal more about who you are, and what you think about. Pot smoking cheerleader huh? But seriously, I think all of us struggle with the normal issue every day. In fact, it has been only recently that I have adapted an un-normal desire to be a bit more un-normal. I like it. .-= GL Hoffman´s last blog ..To Lose Weight, Visualize This =-.

By: JeffW

JeffW — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 15:22:18 +0000

It was good to read your post on this subject, as I somehow assumed I was unique in drifting among groups growing up…recognizing both commonalities and differences is all the various groups/cliques you mentioned. Maybe either a sign of somebody very open-minded and enlightened, or, someone who hasn’t decided who they are yet, or both?

The definition of what is or isn’t normal really fluctuates and changes drastically depending on whom one is talking to……age/gender/level of education/ethnicity/religion/country of origin, etc. When looking at it this way, there really is no “normal”!

What is important is the process of self-evaluation in order to prioritize what is important to you in life to be true to yourself and not to please others or a particular group’s ideal of “normalcy” in order to gain their acceptance. Allowing you to then grant acceptance of yourself builds the confidence required to no longer seek “normalcy”, and will give one the freedom to live the life that is destined to unfold as they move forward.

What does the right mix look like? Depends who is doing the looking! Confidence will give a person this answer. It is like a beautiful painting….who decides? As long as the mix is one of “reveal-advertise” only, and not one of “must buy”!

Risks? Risking offending someone not accepting another person’s uniqueness, or being ridiculed by them. Is that really a risk? What’s the downside to that one….them no longer being in your universe? Hmmmm.